Get a real jump on the holidays—pick meaningful gifts this year

Every year, it starts earlier and earlier.

This year I noticed signs before Halloween, which is far scarier than any goblin that may have come to my door seeking candy.

I’m talking, of course, about the ever-increasing, frenzied push for mass consumerism, supposedly in celebration of Christmas.

Now, don’t get me wrong—I love presents, and Christmas, along with all the other December holidays, is a wonderful time to get together with family and friends and celebrate all the bounties life has to offer.

But there’s a point when it’s taken too far, and I think that line was crossed some time ago.

When it comes down to it, major retail outlets and big box stores care a lot more about what their bottom line looks like at the end of fourth quarter than what kind of holiday you have. Never forget that.

So many of the ads (year ‘round, actually) insinuate, especially to children, that if you don’t receive “X,” or buy “X” or upgrade your already-existing “X,” you aren’t really loved, aren’t really successful and can’t really ever be happy—especially this holiday season.

Which got me to thinking about what really constitutes success and wealth.

Is the definition of wealth really just having more cash than you can spend, as seems to be the message of so much media? If so, it seems wealth would be a sliding-scale type of deal, since one person might be more than content with one amount, while another might end up requiring more to feel “rich.”

On the other hand, I’ve come to believe firmly that wealth is not just about money, though it definitely does contain a financial component. It seems undeniable that having money is not only better than not having money but does make life generally easier.

But what is it that money offers? In and of itself, it means nothing. Dollars are nothing more than (mostly) green pieces of paper with some official-looking stuff on it. It’s not even backed up by gold or silver anymore.

It’s what money can buy that makes it valuable. But there are also so many things money can’t buy.

Those are the things that often count the most. Presents are wonderful, but the best ones are the ones that come from the heart—the ones designed to delight, not just fulfill an obligation.

It’s all too easy to head for the gift card rack (they have them at Wawa now, I noticed, just in case you’re REALLY hard up), instead of taking the time to think up something really good or interesting or unique to give. The onus of obligation to give a gift often leads to a hurried choice, many times without any amount of thought involved.

Which is a shame, because if the holidays are a time for family and friends, why detract from the purpose of gift-giving, which is “I was thinking of you,” by giving something that says “I couldn’t be bothered to think of what you like or are interested in so I threw some money at the problem and bought you a generic gift card...”

Okay, there are times and places, like the out-of-state grandmother buying a gift card to a teenage grandchild’s favorite store because she knows that’s what the kid really wants, that gift cards are a thoughtful gift. But if grandma lives around the corner and drives, how about a nice handwritten card that promises a trip to that favorite store, with the monetary amount spelled out if that’s so necessary? Hey, in the spirit of togetherness, lunch and some nice conversation after the shopping might even be an option.

But thoughtful is the point of any gift.

So, as we all get bombarded with commercials urging us to “buy, buy, BUY!” I thought I’d use my column this week to pitch my own ad:

“Buy truly thoughtful gifts this year! They don’t have to be ridiculously expensive. In fact, some of the best gifts aren’t expensive at all; it’s just that it’s the perfect thing, the thing the recipient always wanted, or just happened to need, or didn’t know was needed. But whatever you come up for your honey, best friend, niece, grandson, whoever you care about, remember you’re buying them a gift because you do care about them. So think about the recipient and choose something interesting, unique, exciting that you think they will really like. Don’t waste your hard-earned dollars on the latest greatest thing that will be forgotten before New Year’s, or some generic item, like a gift card, that will also be forgotten the second it’s cashed. If it’s true that holidays make memories, why not make that memory last by choosing something that will always remind the recipient of that special day, because the item is so wonderful, it will always be cherished and remembered?”

Just make sure you keep the receipt, and the item is returnable, in case you miss the mark.

(Originally published in The Easton News, November 16, 2006)